Whether the Subway Fritos Chicken Enchilada Sub was the result of creative inspiration or an enormous workplace Fritos spill, we'll never know. What matters is it happened, and it's only a matter of time until all foods everywhere will be available topped with Fritos.
Ian: I like that they're thinking in texture. And adding crunch with Fritos is way better than McDonald's creepy BBQ McTickle.
Miles: Yeah, but let's be honest, crunches are the last thing anyone is going to be doing after eating this sandwich.
![Bird's-eye view. (Robert has a bird sitting on his shoulder.)](https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims4/default/b020b28/2147483647/strip/true/crop/1238x928+0+0/resize/880x660!/quality/90/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.npr.org%2Fassets%2Fimg%2F2014%2F02%2F10%2Fphoto-11-814e69487a2e4b0f9481cdbbe11c6d35890e352e.jpg)
Ian: I just feel weird about any food measured in distance. In other countries, does Subway sell metric sandwiches?
Miles: "I'll have a 5-pound 30-centimeter-long, please."
Eva: In small rural villages they sell sandwiches that are "as the crow flies"-long.
Ian: Astronomers measure really long foods in Regret Years.
![This is the only way to get Ian to take his Fritos.](https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims4/default/8aa8258/2147483647/strip/true/crop/1195x897+0+0/resize/880x661!/quality/90/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.npr.org%2Fassets%2Fimg%2F2014%2F02%2F10%2Fphoto-2-2-1c418b0643dd8cc22dab0dc0d8a7792c863dadd1.jpg)
Robert: The freedom to misappropriate ethnic cuisines is the reason we fought the Mexican-American War.
Miles: This is certainly more successful than Subway's Chicken Piñata sub.
![Eva suggests pairing this sandwich with a nice pinot noir stuffed with Fritos.](https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims4/default/64f4359/2147483647/strip/true/crop/1256x942+0+0/resize/880x660!/quality/90/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.npr.org%2Fassets%2Fimg%2F2014%2F02%2F10%2Fphoto-4-2-421579a4446ea90d22f11b299f70bfc2c3296a66.jpg)
Eva: I'm so proud of Jared Fogle — he was able to gain all the weight back in a matter of weeks simply by eating these three times a day! *
Ian: In an amazing synchronicity, a man barfed Fritos all over the train this morning. So I had Fritos on both my Subways today!
![Frito detected.](https://npr.brightspotcdn.com/dims4/default/fc9acc7/2147483647/strip/true/crop/895x670+0+0/resize/880x659!/quality/90/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fmedia.npr.org%2Fassets%2Fimg%2F2014%2F02%2F10%2Fphoto-5-2-8f2aaa9b4e20e4393f12958133d225aad4f88408.jpg)
Ian: Now that we know that a compound used in the making of yoga mats is also used in Subway bread, eating this counts as stretching!
Eva: Yeah, I can just feel my inner chakras expanding.
Robert: I think the Frito Bandito just stole three years from the end of my life.
[The verdict: not bad. It's the kind of thing you'd create with all the random ingredients if you found yourself in a Subway restaurant with no one watching, so it's fun they made it official.]
Sandwich Monday is a satirical feature from the humorists at Wait Wait ... Don't Tell Me!
* Note: Like most things in Sandwich Monday, we're just making this up.
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